#ive been wanting to draw the two of them together again since its been so longgg

[everwisp]

double trouble 🙂🙃

[awsugar]

And I forgot about the DRUMS!!! I think this is an album they may have been working on for years. I think they are going for a magnum opus

yea so i read this went you sent it at 6am cause ive been out of work sick for a few days now and my sleep is allll messed up. and i tinhatted EXTREMELY close to the sun on this one. but i kind of think im cooking. so let me explain.

also ill just say i think because we know somethings coming but we dont know what BUT we know there are threads throughout somehow connecting things from years prior like. all tinhatting is plausible until proven otherwise. if we want to draw a connection between two things we CAN. and i think thats why im so on board with mcr5 now when i havent been since 2019. bc ive done this before. i was in the trenches for the danger days rollout/promo and the transmissions on the website and everything and THAT was one of the most exciting times of my life and THIS reminds me of that. im glad people never gave up on mcr5 but they never gave me ENOUGH before now to really run with. and now they have and its a free for all. THIS is what being an mcr fan is about. tbh. this is what this fandom has been missing for AGES. when they dont give us teasers and lore and crpytic messages we devolve into like theorizing and arguing with each other about who they are as people. but this is the basis of mcr community to me....getting together with your pals inside your phone and inside your laptop (who now have grown ito irl friends for so many of us) and dissecting every shred of info they give us. thank god for my chemical romance.

ANYWAY sorry that. went down a path i didnt intend when i started. so yes um so what you said about them going for a magnum opus. let me tell you a little story. when i was in my first year of being a my chem fan, i was 13, i became QUICKLY obsessed, first with the black parade and then after i spent i think 2 months straight listening to nothing but the black parade on repeat all day every day (literally) i ventured into their other stuff and got like really sucked in to everything else, reading articles and interviews and watching every video of them youtube had to offer and talking about them 24/7 on the forums instead of doing homework, i would sneak the family laptop into my room at night so i could keep reading about them and talking about them instead of having to go to sleep it was THE most exhilarating and exciting time of my life. anyway. i remember (16 years later) reading a specific review of the black parade that said something like "my chemical romance will never top this album and they know it" and i STILL REMEMBER sitting on the couch and crying over it. because i had never listened to music that had made such an impact on me as the black parade IN MY LIFE. nothing had ever made me feel that way and that strongly as listening to that album. you know how we all always say we wish we could listen to my chem for the first time again just to have that feeling again. that was me. i had never experienced an album of their when it came out and i felt like the author of the article was telling me that i would basically never acheive that high again. it was devastating. i promise this is relevant. bc regardless of your PERSONAL FAVORITE my chem album, it is generally agreed upon that the black parade is their magnum opus. it just is. both in scale and musically and its impact on pop culture and its the best known to a general audience.

so you say they're going for a magnum opus. when the black parade is DEAD. they killed it. (in the new lore they were sent to the MOAT which i assume is some kind of exile and stripping of their status as the national band)

and so i started thinking about "in the face of extermination say FUCK YOU" and i think this applies here two-fold actually. MAYBE 3-fold. on one hand, in-universe. extermination being the concrete age, the dictator holding the people down and exterminating their livelihood. but also the extermination of the black parade! and then - irl - we have the extermination of mcr's chances of doing something huge again like this. music publications resigning them as soon as the album came out to never achieving something as epic and grand as that again.

and the FUCK YOU being, the opposition of the dictator from the people, the black parade being reinstated but? maybe they have plans to overthrow the dictator? IRL mcr saying fuck you, we can actually use the concept that you said was the best we would ever do, completely turn it on its head, and make something even more grandiose and epic and MAGNUM OPUS.

and also hail just reminded me obv of the UNKILLABLES drumhead in sydney. which both relates to franks personal experience there but also like. with this concept of in the face of extermination say fuck you. along with his end of tour post being a cockroach, notoriously unkillable! notoriously a target for extermination!!!!

god theres so many layers to this but i needed to get it off my chest do you still like me

[seeminglydark]

how much of his experiences with Caro does Johnny remember rn in SD? Is he getting them back at all?

Spoileryish stuff under the cut for his memories

TL;DR: Initially he remembered almost nothing about it. But now, he remembers that they were a cheerleader and they were friends and he had feelings for them. He remembers the supernatural things. He remembers Caros family was horrible and he wanted to help them, and that he couldnt. He doesnt remember finer details. kisses or hand holding or that they dated. he knows these things because hes been told but the memories arent his right now. but things are coming back.

Long story long RIGHT now at this moment in SD, it still vague for him but he is slowly getting things back. He remembers a cheerleader (he makes reference to a 'cute little cheerleader' in the Creaky chapter that Caro confirms was in fact them.) PTSD, Trauma and brain damage from both abuse and actually physically dying for a short period all contribute to Johnny having a lot of blank spots and fuzzy details in his memories of childhood/teenagehood. He remembers Caro was his neighbor after he puts together that Caro and Carrie are the same person (which takes a bit longer for him since they look and sound a little different these days and his memory of them is distorted, he has no pictures or anything to remind him. There is a scene in Mil-Liminal where Maddie shows him a yearbook photo and at least the part that he knows them QUITE WELL comes crashing back.) He does not remember they did have a chance to become 'official,' and actually dated, it happened so close to his major injuries/brush with death, but he does know it happened at this point, cuz Caro's told him. Things do come back to him, if he's reminded, for instance, Caro being trans now reminds him they told him about it once when they were kids, that it was something he knew about. Caro having their attack the night he hangs out with them reminds him they've ALWAYS experienced the supernatural. he falls into patterns with them that he did when he was younger, such as the way he sings to them or held them because of habit and familiarity even if he doesnt exactly remember. He's slowly putting the pieces back together as they are presented to him. i was asked while writing this reply if he has sense memory, and yes, caros scent, the feel of them, songs they liked together, if he ever gets into the Datsun again, all those things play into it. He does NOT remember the pendant Caro wears. Or that he gave it to them. Or that it was even his. When Caro speaks of him in the podcast, and he listens to it, he does not realize its him they are talking about. When they tell him it was about him, he actually still has a hard time believing that someone could speak about HIM in such a poetic and yearning way. Theres many things he remembers, and many things he knows because hes been told, but he does still have a hard time distinguishing which is which. I do want to note that there is inconsistencies in SD when it comes to these two, mostly because their relationship wasnt actually supposed to be canon, and Caro wasnt supposed to be in SD at all, its been a fun challenge to tie things back together with it, when i first started making the comic, I decided I'd leave room in my narratives for me to be creative and change up original concepts and even the way i draw if i wanted too as long as the Main Story was consistent, which helps keep things fun to create for me, especially for something ive been working on for 6 years! I'm actually touching on Johns memories in i think next months episode of SD, (it can be read early on Tapas's Early access with ink right now) so theres definitely more about it coming up <3

-RJ

[kaihuntrr]

The Sea Prince; Betas and Sketches!

Hello! been a bit since ive done a sketch dump, but it isnt just a sketch dump, it's an announcement!

As @mewhoismyself and I work on the fic, we need an active set of beta readers! The two we have our wonderful, but to keep with the schedule, we need some extra hands and fresh eyes!

Hence, beta readers are once again open!

I am looking for two betas who are experienced in writing, and who are active to give their insights and feedback! currently, i am writing chapter 17, but while i do that, i'd need the feedback as soon as i can get it so i can prepare it for the chapter release dates. shoot a comment down below so i can check your account!

anyway, here's some doodles <3

ONE OF THESE IMAGES BELOW HAVE BLOOD. I AM WARNING YOU NOW.

first off, here's a joke made by a friend :> martyn is scott's babygirl, boom, its canon-

starting off, here's some silhouettes for the other princes ;D I can't reveal them, otherwise the surprise would be ruined! they're all based on different sea creatures, but they are just as scary as Prince Pearl and Prince Chromia. theres other designs i have to get to, but this is a sneak peak of the other terrors lurking in the dark.

speaking of, I got a fun doodle of em <3 the good thing about eating underwater is that they won't get all messy, but there are those times where an audience might watch them eat, they're messy eaters!

these two are pretty, but i really wanted to push their freakier, scarier sea prince sides! more slight changes, but they're both quite fun to draw! their contrasting designs are so much fun to draw together, i love these sillies! oh- and here's a bloodless version!

i absolutely LOVE my sea prince designs, scott and pearl just itch me the right way.

and before i pop off, here's some concept designs for joey and sausage, along with fwhip and gem! since gem is officially a lifer, i think her role in the story might be a bit more focused on, who knows!

wanted to make sure sausage didn't look like his pirates look :0c this au was originally before pirates smp, so i wanted to differentiate them somehow, so i pulled a lot from their empires' attire and see what works! what do you think?

finally, we have the cover art board! im planning to put this all in my pinned post the moment all the covers drop, but goodness, those eyes sure are pretty!

what do you think of the au so far? enjoying it? i hope you are! this au is such a blast <3

[yandere-sins]

Warning: Yandere, Mentioning of an accident, blood, wounds, Needles/IV Drips (Hospital thematic in general), Murder and Suicidal Thoughts

A yandere who always brings fresh flowers when they visit you in the hospital.

The nurses love them, doctors smile at them, and they are generally known as the sweetest and kindest visitor by everyone. It's such a tragedy that you are hospitalized, unable to do much as your body recovers from a tragic accident. But luckily, you have such a wonderful partner who—despite everyone believing they greatly suffer in silence as well—comes to visit you every day. Everyone is swooning about the yan's dedication to you, the way their face lights up when they talk about how amazing you are and how much they love you. They have everyone fooled completely.

No one would suspect they are the reason you are hospitalized.

"I told you to be more careful who you're hanging out with," they reprimand you with a smile curling their lips upwards, holding your hand with the IV needle inserted, and letting their thumb caress your weak joints gently. There's a scolding in the way they pick on your scratches, opening them until they draw blood, but their hold on you is reverent. As if they feared losing you once again if they let go. They told you so many times to stay away from other people! Assuring you countless of days that you only need the yan by your side! But you just wouldn't listen to them... Look what that did to you.

You can only watch them through heavily lidded eyes, barely fully awake with the pain meds clouding your mind. No one can blame you for not truly realizing everything the yan is doing by your bedside. And yet, in the few moments of clarity, when your gaze falls on them, your eyes are filled with deep hatred, only the tube down your throat preventing you from screaming at them.

If only you had listened to them, they wouldn't have needed to take such drastic measures to assure you'd be in a controlled environment, somewhere only carefully selected people could attend to you—including the yandere. Buying you a single room and only putting the best doctors in charge with a small fee to silence them had been much easier than getting you into the hospital in the first place. Perhaps your selfish, little heart will never understand how much pain the yandere had been in before they assured you couldn't go anywhere without their permission anymore. It was not easy to hurt the person they love the most, but it was a necessity. They did it because they love you. They care for you. They adore you.

Now they can finally bask in the glory of it only being you two. Sun shining in from the large windows they opened for you, the summer breeze rustling through their hair and putting its tender winds on your heated skin to soothe. A fresh bouquet of flowers at your bedside, smelling like the outdoors that you'll no longer get to see, and a plate with apple slices in the yan's lap that they pretend to feed you before acting as if they realize it doesn't work since your mouth is occupied, grinning as they say, "Oopsie!" and proceed to eat the fruit themself. No screaming, crying and arguing about things they yan doesn't even want to remember, just the peace of you two being together and the beeping of the machine's keeping you alive.

It's the type of peace the yan could seriously get used to, but despite breaking so many bones, they know they won't be able to keep you here forever. At some point, you will regain control over your broken body. It's not a question of if. It's a question of what comes first: motor function or your voice. Then, the struggle will resume, and this time, more people will be involved than just the few annoying 'friends' the yan had to get rid of after taking care of you. They were too intrusive and accusatory. They thought they knew better than the yan, so they had to teach your friends a lesson they'd remember forever.

Before the yan leaves, they always pull your hand to their lips, kissing it as they promise you their undying love and devotion, in sickness and health, till death do you part. All while they eye the plugs supplying your machines with electricity before forcing their gaze back to you. Even battered and bruised, you are a sight for their sore eyes, and there's nothing they'd rather look at than you, knowing that if you were gone, they'd wither away like a plant without their sun. There is nowhere the yan wouldn't follow you, even beyond the mortal bounds. If you're not on this earth anymore, they will have no reason to remain either. But until then, the yan will gaze upon you for as long as possible, poison their thoughts further as they fill their mind with the sight of you.

Because if they can't have you, no one can.

Even if it kills you both.

[void-chara]

@mcytblrholidayexchange gift for @irrealisms !! you had lots of prompt ideas for writing, but not for art, so i hope you're happy with eclipse federation misery and agony compilation, plus song lyrics

lyric credits: Temporary - Chase Petra / Stranger - The Mechanisms / Easier - The Crane Wives (appears four times) / Two Birds - Regina Spektor / Little Soldiers - The Crane Wives (appears twice) / Heretic Pride - The Mountain Goats

feel free to ask if you want me to adjust some text to make it more readable or something, i think it looks fine but i know different peoples eyes and devices are different, and if i had more time i would definitely have spent more time messing with the colors on everything

speaking. of time. im really sorry i took so long ._. i kind of suck at estimating how long projects will take and how much time i have. thanks for being so patient!!

oh, also, some lyrics and drawings have story reasons for being grouped together, and some went where they looked good. uh. ideally id make sure everything had reason for its location, but this is one area where i did correctly estimate my time, instead of getting stuck in the planning phase.

also in the process of typing all this ive already gone back twice to change stuff in the images and re-add them to the post lol

OH also!! the part where vitalasy jumps off to his death! is as far as i can tell NOT canon accurate!! all the footage shows him jumping off the prison, since thats where he respawns. i didnt think to check this until after id already drawn most of the stuff, and already had the prison drawn, and i didnt want to reorganize the drawing. im telling myself that we only see a few of the later deaths and so theoretically the first one could have been jumping off a grassy ledge somewhere but its still bothering me and i needed to mention it.

anyway yeah really hope you like it i tried some new stuff with this one im not sure how well it turned out and thanks again for being so patient!!

EDITING TO ADD SOME MORE WORDS!!! i love talking about my art! so first, all the text on signs and stuff i did go back and look at videos and vods to make sure was entirely accurate, and i wrote all the words entirely by myself. for the lyrics and other text(death message and DELIVERANCE), i used a text tool first to make sure the words would be neat and where i needed them, and then traced over that on a new layer and deleted the original text layer. my handwritting fucking sucks always no matter what, this was a very necessary step. also! this is officially the first thing i have drawn entirely on my phone, rather than on my ipad like i used to do! also i dont use a stylus of any type i just draw with my finger lol.

[tiny-vermin]

I want to know more about the m9 artist au!! I remember reading a post or two about it a billion years ago (and would love to read them again) 💜

hi jess!!!! thank u for being interested hehe :")

so ever since i drew that lil thing of essek painting a frank stella inspired painting (or even before), ive been thinking of what kinds of art each of the m9 would do. essek ofc is inspired by a minimalist show that i went to here, all the big names from that movement were shown, but those really dark, sinkhole-like paintings are speaking to me. another artwork of boxes made of mirrors also seems like the thing he would do too

there's a kiln here that we visited which was huge, and surrounding it were artists' studios and some other ceramic sellers, i imagine the clay family having a place like this in the middle of nowhere amongst the trees, and caleb would do his work there

anyways because at heart im a shadowgast luver its centred around them,, they meet at an artist residency or something like that and its an incredibly slow burn that involves talking and not-talking and looking and not-looking. in the end i am but a simple wong kar wai fan so. that kinda vibes would definitely influence this, i would describe it as a quiet burning i guess?? time skipy and words that are not said

i think im gonna rant a bit more about their different mediums and styles so i'll keep it under the cut

i think caleb sculpts figures and portraits, but in a sad, kathe kollwitz charcoal vibe. maybe some funky looking animals, perhaps some pots and vases to look at the pretty glazes. he's interested in using fire to burn texture into different mediums, like ive seen it being used on shellac to make a really cool net of ink looking structure.. but yknow, just seeing the aftermath of glazed ceramic from the kiln is enough, and probably better for him to keep his distance anyways

the clay family produces most of the ceramic to sell, vases, pots, plates, cups, teapots, yknow just a whole array. and its really colourful too, depicting every family members different style. i think caduceus would do some matte glazes with a lot of different colours, theyre all a little wonky but theyre better off that way anyways. he does some really mean ink calligraphy and painting though

jester definitely does,, everything, whatever her heart desires kinda thang. she makes pastel textile installations and lighthearted cute paintings, but theyre always so contemplative and soothing. she gets m9 a lot of work cus her mom has connections, etc etc. i really love the idea of jester creating works that talk about the female body and femininity (definitely not projecting no)

beau is a printmaker and photographer who's really experimental, she loves cyanotypes and printing flowers (for yasha), idk she seems like she would put fabric and rocks into the washing machine to see what would happen. u would probably catch her in someone elses studio learning about what they do or in the library learning about what old people did

veth works in a museum as a curator, getting beau to help her sometimes with gathering artworks and artists etc. she probably organises community art projects for kids and public art installations. her house is full of m9's artworks and various other artists shes worked with.

yasha does bouquets as her post-retirement part time job, prior to that no one really knows what she did ("she probably murdered a bunch of people and is now hiding from the government"). fjord draws comics for fun but is also not a job for him, molly is a question mark for me. but these guys probably wont be in it as much anyways

im still not sure what format i wanna do this in, im actually having fun just writing it in my notebook now (digital does not facilitate the creative juices) but i do want to do some visuals like fake movie stills or storyboards. maybe they will work together well???? dunno. working on the other shadowgasty thing im doing made me realise how much easier it is to draw when there's a script already there, so im writing the script for myself

im definitely not as practiced in writing as i am in drawing, but idk im just gonna have some fun and see where that takes me, meanwhile try not to feel too bad that its fanart HAHA (very bad habit)

edit: i just saw my previous thoughts on beau being an art journalist, but i kinda like this better.. but maybe she can do both muah

[idv-harmonic-melody]

(OOC) Explaining what has been going on with my blogs + Some small info about the projects

Hello everypony! It is i, mod Clown, with just a small update that i will be posting here on Robin's blog since it is the only one that i THINK tumblr hasnt completely cut its reach. I will be also be reblogging it in my other active blogs so everyone can see it and i will be putting it in muns corner too since it kinda is an update since i called it it (?) but anyways!

I wanted to make this post since last time i just announced the shutdown of two of my blogs with no reason given and didn't even explained what would happen with the others and with my ongoing projects, so now i wanted to explain it further + maybe yap a little since i'm just built like that......

I will probably yap a lot in this, so i separated each topic and put it under the cut if any of you guys wanna jump in the most important part :3 soooo if you wanna know the updates, look under this Sunday.

About the Murder Disco essence

Since this is the project i'm doing in this blog, i decided to talk about it first. I have been planning this essence since the start of June, and, although i have all the characters chosen and each of their roles and order of deaths planned, i haven't been able to do a lot for it, even if i'm currently on vacation. I want to apologize about it to all the muns who have given me their respective muses to participate in it, i have simply been feeling quite desmotivated to make any art and i was also not. Liking the designs i was making.

But i have picked it up back some days ago! And currently i have 7 designs already finished + they have been drawn on the main essence poster! I will try my best now to finish it all before August ends! Again, i want to apologize for the time it is taking, but i promise i am working on it again. (Like just look at how much time ive spent on the essence poster.....)

Anyways i promise i haven't forgot about ir nor abandoned the project! I thank you all for your patience!!!!

Currently, i have 7/12 skins made, and i have already plans for most of them, i just need to get with actually drawing them! So i will be focusing on doing so now! 🙏

About @askthepianist and @theheavenshospital

So just to put all the info in the same post, i will also be talking about both blogs. I made a post some weeks ago about these blogs being shutdown, but didn't gave any info about it.

What i will be actually doing is just. Moving them to a new blog. I should have said it like that when i first made the posts but when i made it i was a bit tired, so i apologize for that. But yeah, i will be moving both Angeline and Pietro to a new blog, as i will be putting all the Paganini siblings together. I just think that they have a lot of lore and it is a bit of a waste to just show it in small events i do in Angie's blog, so yeah!

Alongside that, the Phantom of the Opera essence i made for Angeline will still be going! It will only be posted in this new blog i'm currently working on. When it will be released?...I'm gonna be honest, i don't know. I think it is pretty clear that i am very bad with dates, but i will be trying to post it asap!

Anyways if any of you guys have read this entire yap session, thank you very much! I will try not dissappearing suddenly again, and while were at it i also want to thank yall for the support you have been giving me.

Anyways, peace love and sunday ftw

[foundationsofdecay]

So, this has been floating around in my head all morning... Give really feels like it's actually a duet between Sleep and Vessel.

Consider the first verse:

You take the dark and carve me out a home I picture you when you are all alone I know how we got here I know how we got here I am the shadow, you're a passenger I am the intake of breath so sharp and I know you better Just want to know you better

The first two lines sound very much like they'd be from Vessel's POV, singing about how Sleep's taken the darkness surrounding them both and carving a home for him, though it's interesting that he specifies that it's a home for himself specifically, not for them both. This is amplified by the next line, it's not thinking of Her when they're alone together, or thinking of Her when he's alone, he's specifically picturing Her when She's alone. That has a couple of different readings: is he picturing Her in a state of solitude, or is he doing so when She's alone like how one might pray for someone in times of need, or some kind of cosmic sense that tells him when She's alone? If this is in fact Sleep being sung to here, that could be its own kind of offering to lend Her strength, since faith and devotion are so critical to Sleep's well-being to begin with.

In my mind, you have Vessel singing the first "I know how we got here", with Sleep coming in for the second, either solo or together, transitioning between the two points of view.

Then, we can take a look at the final three lines. The comment of being a "passenger" reminds me of Granite, of being "more than just a body in your passenger seat". I usually interpret Granite as being from Vessel's POV, though there are some readings that do challenge that. For now, I'm operating off the assumption that Vessel is the passenger here. Thus, who could be the shadow but Sleep? These three lines are really interesting too when it comes to the overall tone; to me, this feels very subtly... not degrading, but self-important, perhaps? Which is also fitting for Sleep at times, if you go off of something like Ascensionism. Vessel is "a" passenger, indicating that there could be others, and yes there's espera in addition to ii and iii and iv, but Vessel's always been /the/ main one, the first, not relegated to the same stature as the others, as if he was just i. Then you have Her say not just that She wants to know him better, but that She knows him better already. That in and of itself could mean several things, but my personal reading is that She's saying She knows him better than to believe/trust/take at face value something that he's saying or doing. Yet despite that, She still wants to know even more.

Onward, then, to the second verse:

I'll tear the fiber from the filament I'll be the limit of your light again I want to taste you better I want to taste you better I will be watching for your enemies To let them know that they contend with me I want to know you're out there I want to know you're out there

For the first four lines, I have a lot of thoughts on how Vessel talks about electronics and code, but for now... You can read the first two lines as being from either perspective, really, but either POV is expressing some pretty serious power dynamics. Here, I'm going to assume he is talking about fiber-optic cables because of the specific words being used here, but there are other types of cables you could draw connections with as well.

Fiber-optic cables are different from other kinds of cables because of these additional 'optical fibers' that are usually in the center, which specifically carry light. They're used very widely, most famously in internet and telecommunication, because compared to regular cables they have higher bandwidth and much faster long-distance communication, and breaks down less often. The optical fiber, simply put, is what makes all of those things possible; without it, if you tore the fiber from the surrounding filament and protective casings in the cable, you wouldn't just be destroying the pathway the light travels down, you would completely remove the ability to communicate with it. It's a line with very sweeping implications.

Limiting the light of Sleep, of Sleep's ability to grow by threatening to withhold offerings or anything else She might want - or perhaps this being Sleep threatening to take away what Vessel's been given earlier, to take him mentally back to where he was when he relied solely on Her. Which way you read it depends mostly on how you interpret Sugar and how you interpret all the imagery of cables and wires and code etc. To me, this reads as Vessel, but in either case it's incredibly possessive, wanting to hold the other close to taste them and take everything they can give while still wanting to provide.

The first "I want to taste you better" is a clear prelude to Sugar, and here there's nothing to imply that the singer already knows the other's taste, so it's likely implied that during this song, and the final chorus in particular, this is what's happening, unless Gods is your pick for that moment in time.

For the final four lines, you also have these layered vocals for "I will be watching for your enemies / To let them know what they contend with me", though this time the other vocals are lower that Vessel's standard register in the song. It's a nice choice in the sound mixing to imply something more aggressive, like it's being spoken through gritted teeth, or perhaps more of a growl. Now, with Vessel being described as Sleep's "weapon of choosing" (depending on how you interpret Blood Sport), this could be Vessel speaking towards Sleep, a promise to fulfill his duty as a weapon, or this could be Sleep, promising to shield Vessel from enemies from the past and use Her presence, regardless of how much power She actually holds, to ward others off.

Now there's the bridge:

In this open warfare I won't fight fair No, I won't fight fair And in your waking moments I will be there I will be there

At this point in the song, taken as a duet, is when we have them singing either in tandem or switching off frequently enough to indicate that they are effectively being sung simultaneously. Here we again have this open acknowledgement of the conflict between the two of them, starting quietly with Vessel's voice somewhat placed to the back, before it comes in stronger in the third line. They'll each do what needs to be done in order to get what they want. It's a quiet admission, to the self or to the other, but as far as this song cares, those are indistinguishable.

Likewise, Vessel's waking moments are Sleep's waking moments, and they'll each be there for the other, no longer having to deal with loneliness like at the start of the song. It's a sentiment that Granite later highlights when Vessel outright says "we'd rather be six feet under than be lonely", and even in that song, using the first-person plural further supports the idea that both of them are echoing this sentiment.

Then, finally, the chorus. I tackled all three as a single entity.

If you want to give Then give me all that you can give All your darkest impulses and If you want to give me anything Then give, give in again I just want to give Want to give you all that I can give All my darkest impulses If you want to give me anything Then give, give in again

The chorus when looked at as a whole, is like a dance to me, which is what inspired the post to begin with. Their layered vocals with as wide a differences between octaves giving a strong sense of two separate characters, and here each one is wanting the same thing from the other. This again draws comparisons to Ascensionism, but in this case it's much less openly destructive - less of an open and aggressive consumption so much as an offering of its own, wanting both to take whatever the other can offer while doing the same in return. Taken as a duet, these words belong to both of them, and with the lyrics, them to one another.

There's a beautiful back-and-forth happening between the balancing of the vocal tracks both as each chorus plays out as well as when you look at them as a whole. We have new harmonies added with each repetition of the chorus until the final one, following the second "I will be there" of the bridge. The truly special thing about this final chorus is how that line is drawn out before finally turning into its own vocal flair that extends throughout the entirety of that chorus. "I will be there", a sentiment that trails into and colors the entire thesis of the song, and by extension, their entire relationship.

[x1e3ju]

another rant: my tumblr era has started i feel withdrawals…

i might not finish this so if it gets posted. something won but drawing most definitely did not ToT anywho this is in fact another persona rant! im fixated on kingdom hearts pretty heavily now but i still hold persona very very dear to me as we now dhskd im here to rant about the aigis and yukari, this wont be as in depth as last rant but hey its worth a try and its been on my mind why not

thinking about aigis’ character and everything about her character down to her bisexuality really makes me wish they explored her humanity more. i know she wasn’t an allegory really or anything of that sort just more of a “plot device” of sorts to help handle the theme of appreciating your humanity and living and all that. but i love her so much so yes, as indulgent as it is, i want to explore that for her hehe. since i played the game and my fixation and love for aigis had commenced, ive always sorta shipped her with yukari i guess? because i think they would really nice together lmao and also because i think there’s so much potential between a dynamic like that between the two of them.

i was working on a fanfic idea and i had written some stuff i really liked but in short the idea was about aigis and yukari and how their relationship would develop during the answer time or after the events of the main game basically and how they would deal with makoto’s death in a rather odd manner to say. mind you, ive never seen the answer dlc and knew very little about it so i sort of didn��t include that specific time but anywho, no matter all that, the point of in short is that aigis and yukari only really find that sort of sense of “love” in each other because they both remind each other of makoto. i know that sounds probably insane and i don’t really like writing about gay couples and just focusing it so much on societal standards or like in sapphic relationships for example, i don’t like the fact so many are based around men and comphet and all that but i feel that this would be such an issue for how aigis and yukari would navigate their lives afterwards, as of course it would be, i think it has a lot of potential to be discussed and i know atlus would never state it the way that i think it would look but just in the friends way and not in the jealous “he was mine!!” way, its so ridiculous bc again, i havent seen it myself but i know its handled so horribly i dont even wanna imagine. ill see it eventually ToT

but anywho, i think their relationship has a lot of potential to be explored. just the ship dynamic in general and aigis having to handle teen emotions lmao. i think her being extremely awkward and learning the concept of embarrassment would be hilarious i mean mostly tragic but in a way, it’s something that could speak to a lot of people. and i know the game didn’t have time to really explore that and i think surprisingly they did pretty well with what they did with aigis and just that game in general (the first and last time lmao) but im just saying whatever yk fhsjfb

i just wish more media expanded on what toxic relationships genuinely are. i wish more ppl thought critically and realized the very thin but visible line between toxic and abusive and didn’t either glorify or exaggerate it so much yk? like i wish more media discussed mutually toxic relationships and actually didn’t put such a disgusting narrative like they always do especially with gay women and sapphic couples. just for the fetish it’s absolutely disgusting just like with gay men and the power dynamics its like… why. why are we missing the point here how do we manage to make the same mistakes everytime ToT i like aigis and yukari as a ship because its something that already in itself is a bit questionable to say the least and it could really feed off well on that differentiation between their humanity you know? and also handling grief but realizing that its the same and they both need to let go you know? it’s like even with yukari and mitsuru, i wish more people didn’t treat them like “aww cute gay girl couple from persona 3!! yass lesbians diversity win!!” and actually thought on the WAY bigger picture that their relationship is and just how messy and complicated and tbh, really unfortunate it would be. although i do think that mitsuru and yukari would probably “be together” late in the future like probably reconnect late 20s or smth but it would all have to be secret and still, mitsuru would never be able to really be with her due to the company and marrying off and all that. and just with mitsuru’s avoidant personalty and a bit of nativity and i personally headcanon yukari with bpd or just a more emotionally based personality disorder so those leading factors would probably make their relationship to actually come to fruition so difficult

ok i was going to finish this and ill still post it but my head hurts so bad rn i hate playing kingdom hearts the graphics are miserable omg.. so ima head to sleep at only 3 am like a loser.. goodnight to the dust under the bed and alsoooo

goodnight too to the inspo for today’s rant.. i was finally able to get my hands on a baby aigis and she has arrived and im so happy i feel like a father right now… even the box has naorise tooo like fjskfjr♪٩(๑>ꇴ< ๑)و ♪ …you all better say goodnight to my child im looking at you too dust bunnies dont think i forgot

[xherry7816]

not 2 brag but ive offically reach 100 likes YIPPIE !!!!

anyways i thought abt the thiefKAI au (gosh i hate KAI so mcuh hes always in my head) and i tried 2 make like drawing 4 it.

so basically if this was a long au i think itd start, yk, at the start so at the time KAIs just starting out but like gaining traction from society or whatever

so these are what i had in mind for like his og look, i gave him this fat hood bc A, i cant draw hoods and B, i think he looks silly (in a good way) erm and his shirt reached to just under the crotch. gosh erm i didnt like saying that, can i say upper middle thigh reigion ?? uhhh yeah. OH and the question is raised oh yeab sure its makes sense he could have become a thief because he needs food and supplies for him and NYA but why is he becoming some big scale infamous theif ?? thank you fot asking and well my answer is GARMADON (aaaahh!!) or some other large scale villain hiring KAI to steal all this expensive important stuff to yk exchange for money. the villain gets to progress with thier evil scheme and KAI, who is yk oblivious, gets money from it - win win situation.

i was thinking about giving well known better off more successful theifKAI to be wearing an oni mask, yk the full coverage and cool power boost (specifically the mask of hatred because it turns u all lava-y and how the color ourple is associated with royaltly and therefore the wealth and expense KAI loathed for in childhood which i think would be a nice way 2 tie it all together) but idk if that made him too OPish if yk what i mean but then again its not like hes in awarw of the other two masks, not that he'd go on a quest for them unless he knew they were valuable so maybe i will give him the mask.

and o my dear friends you may wonder AA WHAT ABOUT NYA ??? FEAR NOT compadre for i have a plan for him HOHO. so obviously NYA isnt oblivious to her brother's job shenanigans but hes kept enough of it away from her that she doesnt have enough of the pieces to put it all together so basically he has no idea whats goinf on with her brother. however NYA does manage to grow up somewhat comfortably and she manages to secure his place quite high in BORG.INC, aha saying INC kinda makes it sound evil. in this way she gets acquainted with PIXAL, ZANE and JAY who are during this time all ninja bc yk BORG stuff. btw we are moving this all into an au where the world turns out somehwat the same even without KAI just so i dont have to imagine the whole word differently bc thatd be hard and id make plenty of inconsistencies. ANYWYAS theyre all friends which is cool however NYA has a secret identity, ull never guess it,,,, SAMURAI X whoo !!!! SAMURAIX is a solo vigilante that not only stops crime but sometimes teams up with the NINJA (whos identies are secret) to fight bigger gangs.

everyone gets acquainted during one of KAIs heists where hes tryna steal, idk a golden weapon because theyv all been dug up and put on display in old rich peoples homes. i feel KAI is more on the stealth side of things but once he engages into battle he likes to be a little eccentric but cornered hes awfully angsty. this is indeed still and elemental master au! however KAI and NYA have not yet realised they can will the elements.

ill stop drawing KAI now i need 2 draw the other members, its literally been months since ive drawn LLOYD and ive never drawn PIXAL,,, someone please take this au i want 2 see something be done witj it TT

[bunnypopgal]

Hello. It's been a few years since i made this blog and made my first post. I now deleted my first post bc i found it to be cringe and honestly really painful. i have grown a lot in these past years and have seemingly beat my hallucinations for now. i know that will most likely come back prob once i become a mother one day but i feel more prepared to beat them again.

Other than that i dumped and got dump by two partners, made and lost almost all my friends besides one. dont judge by like im sure many of us are im a sucker for the friends turned lovers trope and well ive been dating my best friend for almost going 2 years now. he has been super accepting, a wonderful partner and my biggest support thru it all so far. hes my only support system honestly.

i am deeply scared to make friends again after what my last friend did to me.. for years and i just let her. i cant really blame it on having low self worth either since i honestly really like myself and who i am but more so i didnt know HOW to be treated by others. let me be clear NOT how I treat others, no-no but HOW others SHOULD treat ME. isnt that nuts? you think that would be something we just have inside of us as humans (or otherwise) that we would just KNOW that. i dont FEEL like a doormat either but maybe i am. not with everyone, mind you. just like people ive grown to have developed a trusting bond in with respect packed in there like a mozzie stick, yum, ya know? i love em like chosen family and youre gonna body shame me for not being short for a woman, like what? you think i wouldve picked it out asap that chick SCREAMED pick me but i also saw her good qualities too which is why i wanted to be friends with her... i trusted her a lot. Oh well tho.

As much as it still hurts sometimes the fear is still there. i, as a woman also fear other woman. i know, i know. there is so many other wonderful women out there who would never treat me so badly but my brain is gone broken from so many traumatizing events over and over again. it irrational, i know it. its also isolating. i dont go out much at all but honestly blame the economy for that. i plan to be getting a part time job soon which you can also blame the economy for haha but also i want to meet people and have some kinda structure in my life again. hoping for friends right now is something im maybe not ready for honestly i think ill just start with talking to people again and let that be that. i hope to get some kind of a cleaning job so it will be a little to no talking to people depending on where im set up.

im just kinda scared to open myself up again to other people. online of course is different mainly besides the usual explanation but also for me, the internet is a black hole where NO ONE see the crap i shit out which includes my art i make sadly. i dont really try all like hard to make people see it anyways. i am still scared of people after all.

anyways today i have plans to hang out with my partner before he has to go to work. im hoping we can play palworld together again hehe. Other than that its house chores and back to drawing for me today. i just came out of another depressive episode recently so i have a few great messes to clean up. its a good thing i like cleaning, ya know when i dont feel like i wanna disappear. what can i say, its genetic. thanks, dad haha.

im planning to get back into my old hobbies too like live streaming. ive been live streaming all over the internet off and on since i was maybe 14. im 23 now so 10 years!!! WOWIE!! when i was growing up my family would joke around saying i need my own reality show haha. i do have a huge personality, ig but thats something im very comfortable and like about myself. bold and funny, i think!! streaming is a super relaxing thing to me. i talk to myself anyways and i always have. you dont stay this "sane" without talking to yourself to fight off the loneliness haha.

that reminds me recently my partner told me he found me to be a "increaser of morale, an inspiring person, you're motivating and you make being emotionally positive SO EASY." im still so stunned and very very VERY flattered he told me that! even if its not true im glad he feels that way bc thats a nice way to be. hes very very sweet to me.

well i could write forever right now honestly but i should probably go drink enough water to take out a house fire so i dont die of dehydration.

oh, if only. (JOKING)

[memento-morian]

oh man honestly didnt think wed get past round 1 considering my irl boyfriend is an actual person and not a blorbo from media which is a disadvantage on the blorbo from media webbed site

but its also the wizard website so i shouldve also taken that into account.

BUT! WE DID IT. WE MADE IT TO ROUND 2. WHICH MEANS... MORE PROPAGANDA. once again: he is gay, trans and polyamorous.

he takes me to taco bell pretty often just cause i love baja blast and sweet lightning (our taco bell is also a kfc so i can get both from one place) and he just. did that. and when i mentioned it was a date he hadnt even thought of it like that. he was just doing it cause he knew it made me happy. he doesnt even judge me for stealing a handful of the honey packets.

my grandpas old and i take care of him and he was in the hospital not too long ago and has been having problems so john came over and helped clean the house. he even steamed the carpets. he made TWO FULL SIZE pot pies for my grandpa as well when he came home. from SCRATCH and he bought all the ingredients with his own money. he didnt have to do any of this, but he did anyway.

he and his family invited my brother to christmas and new years cause my mom had recently left (my brother is underage) and they didnt want him to be alone for the holidays. he cried about it. dont tell him i told yall he cried.

anytime i feel unsafe or uncomfortable i can call him and hes there asap and ready to defend me if needed. he makes sure my family and i are okay and helps whenever and however he can despite him not really getting anything out of it. hes just genuinely kind even if he tries to pretend hes not.

his parents got married in vegas and both of us just wandered around together and didnt do much but it was still nice. we go to the thrift store a lot for cosplay stuff and even though ive gotten a pair of boots most times weve gone he always buys them for me anyway. he takes care of everyone. always. except himself, but thats why he has me and our other partners. hes so cool and funny and he is VERY ALLERGIC TO HORSES. but he likes them anyway and wants to get a farm. hes allergic to bovines as well iirc. but he still wants to be a gay farmer. hes a great cook and as much as i love every adventure weve been on, my favorite moments are still just the quiet ones we spend in his room playing minecraft together.

when my moms husband was around a lot he was there for me and calmed me down from panic attacks. when i hurt him a lot by accident one time he still was there for me waiting with open arms. even if i didnt deserve it. he helps me make phone calls cause they give me intense anxiety and holds my hand through everything. he lets me infodump about my interests even if he doesnt understand what im talking about and is more than willing to join me in them if i ask. he brought me mtn dew when i was in the hospital which was just a small silly gesture, sure, but it made me so happy. we fostered a kitten for a few days and he named her new york mets. she was a princess and is now with a loving family but we still adore her. he has two cats (that live at his house at least, since he also shares custody of my cat rusty) named monster truck and adam and he dotes on them constantly. even if he does call monster truck a bitch. because she is a bitch. every time were at a convention and he sees a booth with beanie babies he stops and scopes and usually buys at least one and we have to drag him away or else his fixation will turn him more beast than man for the rest of the week. he also loves horror of all types and so when i saw a custom beanie baby bear called The End i got it for him with jams help for christmas and it was a little late but he was so so happy about it

also... hes an artist and hes so amazing and talented. he can draw, he can sew, he can paint and despite everything? he stays silly. just like jam, i met john at a convention. my first convention, but my first was a few years before jams first.

i was still an egg. i was cosplaying davesprite. me and my best friend at the time (who was Not Great but i hadnt realized that yet cause he was my only friend) found our way to the homestuck corner and thats where i met him. he was immediately kind. my brother got his number and eventually learned that he actually lived near us and so he started going over all the time. i generally didnt go with. johns family was dealing with A Really Big Thing at the time so he was generally busy and his parents were being overprotective. my brother, who is too social and doesnt understand when he shouldnt be the center of attention, went to his family members funeral without being invited. he didnt tell me we werent invited so i was there too.

how poetic it is that our friendship really started to grow at one of his family members funerals, and years later, not too long after we started officially dating, we went to another together. a little morbid, yes, but i think its thematic. ouroboros. i was at least actually invited this time lmao. its been 6 years since i met him??? and i wouldnt trade a minute of it. not for all the money in the world. there arent many people i could walk up to and say 'do you wanna go gem hunting with me for a full day or more?' and get an enthusiastic 'yes' from, but he will. jobs make doing that kinda thing hard ofc but if it werent for that i doubt wed be home as much as we are cause were adventurers! we climb and hike and scramble and explore and im so glad i get to adventure with him. even if the adventure is mostly just navigating adulthood.

picture of me, jam, and of course the man of the hour: John The Wizard Himself at the 100 gecs concert we went to recently.

John battle 2.14

Johnathan the wizard (real life) VS John Smith (???)

[wall-eye]

Feels great to be ignored. Being ignored unintentionally hurts worse tho

[igucci]

i dont really share things about my personal life very much anywhere... but i just want to share a bit.

i finished finals for my hardest class load so far, but im afraid that i spent a little too much time with art when i should have been studying, that i didnt do as well as i anticipated. well, i probably shouldnt have taken them all together in the first place-_- but now i should be finished with my two years by next spring. and i need to begin applying to programs...

now finals are over since yesterday, and i think i will have some more time to draw and practice with other things. unfortunately for me, ive just always loved to draw, so i cant ever imagine myself stopping. -____-

anyway, if youre reading this, thank you so much for being with me, even if im still not very consistent with what i want my art to look like (and the things i draw.). it makes me so happy that there are people who like to see it. i want to finish spectacular spiderman, and create more goods (its really strange to see something you draw with a drawing tablet in a tangible form.)

i think im done rambling. thank you again if you read this far... im just trying to survive a little in my academic life, and in my hobby life (even if i wish it was my job!) i hope i can resume drawing this weekend. ^^

[angstysebfan]

The Past Can Break You - 1

Pairing: Bucky x Reader

AU: Avengers

Summary: You and Bucky have been dating for aa few years. As far as you’re concerned he is the one. But what happens when a blast from the actual past shows up?

A/N: Ive seen a lot stories of Bucky getting his first love from the 40′s back. And I’ve always wondered... what would happen if he was dating someone already? Reader is from this time. Not proofread.

--

If someone asked you what you loved about being an Avenger, you would definitely say the people. Not even the people you save, but the other members of your team who have become your family. See, you didn’t have a family growing up, and when Tony brought you into the Avengers you had no idea that he was also bringing you into the family.

Sam, Steve, and Thor were your big brothers, always protective. Natasha and Wanda were your best friends and sisters. Tony was definitely a father figure to you as well as one of your favorite people in the world. Bruce and Vision were two very good friends that you knew you could always count on. And Scott was the funniest person on the planet and always made you laugh.

But none of them compared to Bucky. When you first joined the avengers Bucky was new too. You guys became very close friends and eventually developed a very loving relationship. He was nervous at first to ask you out because it had been so long since he dated anyone. When he was back in the 40s he was definitely a ladies man but now he was more reserved and shy, which you didn’t mind.

Before you started dating he did tell you about his first love, Dot. You knew that she was his first love and tried not to be jealous of a woman from the 40s, and you tried not to compare his love to her to his love for you. You knew he missed her, but hopefully now that he was dating you, not as much, as selfish as that sounds.

You now have been dating Bucky for 2 1/2 years, and it’s safe to say that he is the love of your life. You both moved into the same room and spend as much time together as possible when you’re not on missions. In fact you’re out with Natasha and Wanda right now getting a special gift to wear tonight with Bucky.

“What’s the occasion for this again?” Natasha asked.

“Oh nothing, just feel like making him feel special,“ you say with a wink. Both girls rolled her eyes at you and continue searching for the perfect lingerie for you to wear for him.

When you got back to the compound you walk to the common room with your new purchase super excited to show your soldier later.  you see everyone standing around staring at this big contraption that’s now in the middle of the common room. You walk up and stand next to your boyfriend staring at both the contraption and Tony who looks super excited.

“What the hell is this?“ you ask. 

Tony looks at you and see the excitement in his eyes like a kid on Christmas. “I’m not sure. I found it in the archives when I was looking for something. I thought we could all open it up together,” her says.

You look at your boyfriend who gives you a shrug of his shoulders and a smirk, “He has been like this for a half hour,” he says as he wraps his arm around your waist and pulls you closer, kissing the top of your head.

“Where were you off to?” He asks, ignoring the commotion for a moment.

“Oh just picking up something for you… for me to wear… in bed.. tonight,” you say.

You see Bucky’s eyes darken as he leans closer to you, “well can’t wait to see it and rip it off of you then, Doll,” he whispers in your ear before placing his lips on yours.

You giggle as you then lean your head toward Tony and the contraption. You see Tony pressing a few buttons before some air or steam come out the top and the door opens. When the steam clears you all see there is a woman inside who appears to still be alive.

“It’s a cryogenic chamber!” Tony shouted in excitement.

Everyone stepped back to give whoever was in the chamber a few moments to awaken and come out slowly. After they clambered out you realized it was a red headed woman. You hear Bucky’s breath hitch as you all get a look at her face. Suddenly the woman looks at Bucky.

“Jamie?!” She asked.

You look at your boyfriend who is in shock looking at the woman before him. His hand around your waist falls away from you as he starts to step toward her.

“Dot? Is… is that really you?” He asks in amazement.

Suddenly your own breath hitches as you realize that your boyfriend is looking at his first love. The woman you felt you had to compare to. The one you thought he would never see again. She was now in your living room staring at Bucky in disbelief.

“I thought you were dead! How are you alive?” She asks.

“It’s a long story,Doll. One I’ll have to tell you later,” he says as he smirks at her.

She reaches out and pulls him toward her in a strong hug. Your heart slowly begins to break as you feel completely helpless, and selfish at the same time. You see all your friends, Steve included, are giving looks of sympathy.

You start taking slow steps back, not wanting to draw any more attention to yourself. You stumble and stop though when you see her kiss him. Your heart is officially obliterated. No way will you stand a chance next to Dot.

Bucky had his first love back. He didn’t need you anymore. You quickly turned away and leave the room: no one calls for you, letting you go. Bucky and Dot don’t even notice.

Bucky pulls away from Dot, “I’m sorry, I can’t. There is so much we need to talk about, but I can’t…”

He trails off as he finally turns toward the room and sees that you are gone. He feels terrible and steps away from Dot.

“You should go down and see Bruce. Get checked out. I’ll meet you down there. I just have to check on something first,” Bucky says.

Dot grabs his hand, “Please don’t leave me. I don’t want to be alone,” she begs.

Steve steps up, “I’ll go with you Dot. Bucky will meet us down there,” he says.

Bucky gives his best friend a thankful smile before nodding at Dot and turning toward your shared room. He didn’t know what to say. He didn’t even know what to think. All he knew is that he was at a crossroads where one or all of the participants will get hurt.

He was terrified.

- -

Chapter 2

Ok so as I said up top, I always wondered what would happen if Bucky’s 40s gf came back while he was dating someone else. I feel for both reader and Bucky in this situation because this is a tough situation. Looking forward to writing it! Feedback is appreciated!

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